Sweet sorrow

Today I was drawn to wear my Apollo ring. It's not one I specifically procured in His name or in His honor. It's one which was gifted to me many years ago and over the years I've only worn it on occasion. At the beginning of this summer I felt a powerful call to wear it. It was around the same time that Apollo was becoming more of a presence in my life. I've written before about how He surprised me with His involvement in my labyrinth consecration! He is also the one who gave me my name. It is not one I share outside of mia famiglia, tho I do believe that will soon change.


I have been complaining about the earlier sunsets and now, we've almost reached the balance point. After that, I think I will miss Him in a way I haven't experienced before, hence the title of this post. I've always been very Goddess centered because there is too much male = God energy in the world. However, I need to balance that energy within myself first. This transition into the next cycle of the year has been a strange one for me. I have gone over some of my posts from the summer and there was a definite theme running through it.


Many Pagan groups, especially the ones who celebrate "Mabon" appear to be very focused on the male journey. The King is sacrificed for the land, he goes away, he is conceived once again, the Goddess is pregnant, and then she gives birth. He grows up, faces challenges, is proven worthy of the Goddess, they mate, the King is sacrificed, and around again we go. The amount of focus on it seems incredibly Christian. Every Sunday they celebrate this sacrifice. Maybe that's why I'm tired of it when it comes to this time of the year. Maybe it's because I don't see it as the King being sacrificed for the people. It's really about Mother Earth. The wheat grows from Her body. And why is the wheat a he? The tree flowers, the flower turns to fruit, the fruit falls, is buried, sprouts and a new tree is born from the death of the fruit. The Sun, or Father Sky assists, but all of this takes place in and on Mother Earth.

In my tradition, the cycle of the Goddess is the focus and it's not only a mimic of a life cycle, it's a shift in focus, or power. We are transitioning into Her aspect as the Dark Mother. This is the time of the Greater Mysteries, of the transformation of Proserpine from maiden of flowers to Queen of the Underworld. I've posted before about this time of year and how we're supposed to be "going within" and using this allegedly not busy season to focus on spiritual improvement and exploration.


I'm going to leave off here about the cycle of the year and pick that up again another time, when I have proper examples and pictures to add! Part 1!